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01
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Landlord sent me a formal written notice because my doormat was "too personalized" (OH)
"I wish I was making this up.
Got an official looking letter in my mailbox last Tuesday. Sealed envelope, my name typed on the front, I thought it was jury duty or something. Open it up and this man has written me a formal notice because my doormat that says "go away" is quote "not in line with the welcoming atmosphere of the property"
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02
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There are many ways to become a problem tenant. Not paying rent. Throwing loud parties. Secretly housing six extra roommates and a raccoon. You know, classics.
Having a $12 doormat from TJ Maxx that says “go away” is… not usually on that list. And yet, here we are.
One tenant recently opened their mailbox expecting something mildly stressful, like jury duty, only to find something far more confusing: an official notice from their landlord. The offense? A doormat. Not broken, not offensive, not obstructive, just… not “in line with the welcoming atmosphere of the property.”
Now, let’s pause. Because the idea that a doormat, arguably the most passive object in existence, could disrupt the emotional tone of an entire building is already doing a lot. But it gets better. This isn’t a new tenant causing chaos. This is someone who’s been there for two years, pays rent on time, keeps to themselves, and has made exactly two maintenance requests. In landlord terms, that’s basically a dream scenario.
But the mat? The mat crossed a line.
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03
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"It's a $12 doormat from TJ Maxx. It's a joke. Everyone knows it's a joke. My neighbor thought it was hilarious when I moved in.
I've been here two years, never late on rent, had maybe two maintenance requests total. But the doormat is where we draw the line apparently."
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04
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Meanwhile, two doors down, there’s apparently a full-blown garden gnome civilization and a wind chime that sounds like it’s fighting for its life in the breeze. No notes. No letters. No concerns about atmosphere. Just vibes.
Faced with this deeply serious violation, the tenant did what any reasonable person would do: escalated.
Enter phase two. A brand-new doormat, reading: “come back with a warrant.” Subtle? No. Effective? Absolutely. It’s not just a replacement, it’s a statement. A very, legally flavored, statement.
There’s also a small fund set aside in preparation for whatever fine might come next, which adds a level of commitment that deserves recognition. This isn’t just about a doormat anymore. It’s about principle. It’s about how far someone is willing to go when told their front door energy is too aggressive.
And maybe that’s what makes this so satisfying. Not the conflict itself, but the refusal to take something this ridiculous too seriously. Because at the end of the day, it’s a doormat. It sits there. It gets stepped on. It minds its business.
Unlike some people.
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05
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"I've been here two years, never late on rent, had maybe two maintenance requests total. But the doormat is where we draw the line apparently.
I have a neighbor two doors down with an entire garden gnome village outside his unit and a wind chime that sounds like a xylophone fell down a staircase. Nobody has said a word to him in 3 years.
Already ordered a second doormat that says "come back with a warrant" and I have a little money from Ѕtake sitting aside specifically for whatever fine this man tries to hit me with because I already know where this is going
Fully prepared to d*e on this hill"
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06
Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.
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ScruffyN3rfHeader
If the "come back with a warrant" gets to much heat try and find the "don't stop, be leaving" one next
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Aggravating-Fox8553
Well landlords will literally ignore a whole gnome village just to power trip over a 12 dollar doormat lol. the come back with a warrant replacement is peak petty compliance. pls put up a ring camera just to catch his reaction tbh
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Noidentitytoday5
Ha, I’d say you don’t want a welcoming doormat- that’s how vampires can come in your home.
Out crazy their crazy behavior.
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IamNotTheMama
Have him point out in the lease where it says "no personalized doormats"
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ArdentLearner96
Like others said if not postmarked, definitely document the envelope to point out as evidence since you have to pay for postage to use a box meant for mail
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YoursTrulyCejay
I’d be petty and get one that says “go away please”
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kekeandthepoodles
Have one custom made that says “my landlord hates this doormat”
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BothDescription766
Buy the same mat but en france.
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LordOscarthePurr
lol mine says don’t let the cats out or the cops in.
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Warm-Day8313
Go out buy one for every door. Now it suddenly fits the ascetic.
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anti__thesis
Man if you get the “come back with a warrant” one it’ll prob get stolen. Source: mine got stolen 😂
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at-the-crook
Could get one that says,
"Do Not Disturb"
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zillabirdblue
Do NOT pay a fine for this. Tell him he can take you to court. What a total joke. 🙄
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dufferwjr
"a wind chime that sounds like a xylophone fell down a staircase" 😂😂😂!
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EntildaDesigns
Mine says "Dogs Welcome, Humans Tolerated"
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AnnoyedHoneyBadger
Are you SURE the letter is actually from your landlord or a Petty Betty neighbor?
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SuperExcuse
I’ve had the same exact one for 5+ years at multiple places. Can attest to many a laughs when touring people walk by or neighbors guests
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Sitcom_kid
xylophone fell down a staircase is way funny
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